Have you heard or thought about this before?

It does happen to me all the time.

I think, this is it, this is where everything is gonna decide, everything is on me, right here, right now...

funny ej....

Anyways,
dont even know why I brought that up... just a random thought....

So what is new? Nothing really... Been hangin out with my peepz a lot lately.... awesome feelin... I guess I ve kind of needed that!

Wondering how long its gonna last.....
Already waiting for the change..cant be far ;-)

sis is in london..hope she is gonna get what she REALLY wants....
and hope the thing with her boy works out, kind of already have an aversion against him, but well its her thing and i guess i m a different typ of guy after all, so I see things differently...
You know what, sometimes I really wonder if I m gay or not... LOL
strange feeling...

Ok,
gotta go, get my bash bro his bday present..hope he is gonna like it....

Take care,
Rich

Friday is gonna be the last day of work for me. I cant decide if I m happy for it to end or not. It was a good time. I had a lot of fun, chilled, got to meet a couple of fun people.

Then again a lot of people annoyed me and I got supertired that I passed out drivin and sittin in class so many times.

I guess its good its over. We ll see...

Today I m gonna go to the final, which is gonna be in Frankfurt. I m goin with my dad, yay.... I dont know. I m glad my dad is comin, because I feel like we havent done anything in ages and we used to do stuff together so often and it was fun too.

So I really think its a good thing...

What else has happened? I dont know.. Been thinkin a lot again. Been talkin to a couple of people about a couple of things. Wish I could change things, but I cant.

Good things!
Got some quality time with Flo,Julia,Jim and Kai... good thing... I guess they are after all still my friends...

Tilman is still alive and comin back next week...yeah baby =)

Anyways, thats it for now, because I gotta run... I ll be back to write more later...

No one out there worry bout me, ok ;-)

I m fine, seriously!

Things could be better, but couldnt they always be??!

Havin a good time!

Take care out there!

Another sleepless night,
another moment filled with fright,
another boring day.
What more can I say!?

Nothing ever happens at all
To sleep is where I m gonna fall!
All those people everywhere around
I wonder if everyone is gonna be found?

Is even someone waiting for some of them?
or might one of them be a lonely mam?
Is there still joy within every single one
or is all there happiness long time gone.

Watching the movie Love actually
all the love seems to come naturally
But its just a movie they make?
so is all of it fake?

Sometimes it seems like its all fun,
sometimes they are protecting with a gun
sometimes its all fate
and sometimes its just hate.

All those differences during one day
Isnt that a job for which you could pray
What some of the others consider a crime
I m still havin a good time.

poem by RJ

Its funny, how sometimes success colours peoples lenses. Losing all the time, you see the single players out there, that fight against each other and then when you win, they are a team for once.
It makes it kind of hard to be a team leader, because you want it to be a team all the time, but whatever you do and whatever you try, it just doesnt work out!

What does being a team mean? How can you influence it.....

I just wish I could, I wish I could....

So, this is it once again!

Haha I finally found someone that likes my fav. movie, funny ej ;-)
Yeah someone besides me likes "A walk to remember". Unbelievable.

I ve been thinking a lot the last week. What is wrong with me, why do I have to be so different, why do I wanna be so special, why do I wanna be so perfect. I guess I know, but why does it have to be me. Why cant I be one of the people that dont care.

Yesterday I went out with someone. We talked for a while and the person made me think a lot, reflecting and thinking over stuff again.....

It feels really strange.... Gosh I m 24...when will I know...when will I know!?!?!

Seoul 2002..oh what a year...

"I will always remember....."(girl next door)

Thx everyone....

I know what you goin through! I feel just the same! I wish it would be any different, but its not. Its time to let go, to save yourself!

I thánk you for all the memories. All the joy, just everything, you ve definately changed my life. You made me get up, when I was down. You showed me life, you made it worth living.

I know this is probably the wrong spot to put it, but I dont know if I will be able to tell you any other way, it would probably be to hard for me. I ve been thinking a lot the last couple of hours and it doesnt make anything easier. Its only been 18 hours since we talked, but it seems like everything has changed, everything is just so different, although its not, but in the end it is....

Life is here, life is now and thats where we should be and where we ve got to be!

I still love you and I miss you.......

Everything goin up is gonna come down!
All those years,
all those fears....
dude...Where have i been?
What have I seen?
What will there be?
What will I see?
Sometimes life just makes me numb
I feel like everything is so dumb?
I lose the faith in everything there is
and then there is nothing that I miss.
joy, fun, luck?
hate, fury, they all suck!
What am I here for?
Man, theres gotta be more
Where will I find my task
so I can finally drop my mask?
People dont even realize I act
yeah I do, 24/7...thats a fact
Yo I dont even know who I am
sorry to tell you, oh bam.
ups did that come out of my mouth
Guess so, cause everything is going south
But dont worry g, I ll be fine
and one day, maybe the joy will be mine
yo now i gotta go, its seven already
and life is out there, it is ready
Have a good day
thats the last thing i say!


"So after all is said and done
I know I'm not the only one
Life indeed can be fun, if you really want to" - (Des´ree - Life)

Have you ever felt like you are burned out and nothing even is worth doing? not even eating?

Anyways.... I started working as a volunteer for the FIFA Confederationscup (pre world cup tournament) at the Frankfurt International Airport. Its quite fun and I m definately havin a good time there. All those different characters, quite funnny...

And not just the volunteers, but also the other people at the airport, its quite interesting, can be nice, fun and sad as well... but right now, I m really having a good time, although the people there are really disorganized.

What else is new? Oh our baseball season is not going as well as expected. We sit in 9th place(10 team league) with a 4 -12 record.. sucks right... Yeah it really does.... I hope we will get out of the basement next weekend, because we play the last placed team and if we win both, we will probably be in 6th place.

School? hm... yeah i know... i should study more...really should, but you know... things always go a little different

fam?
i dont really know.. moms back home
sis got a bf ...whhhhoooooooooooooooohooooooooooooooo
but besides that... I dont even get to see them anymore... life is just keeping me busy..hihi

Gf!
MIIIIIIIIIIISSSS YOU Michelle!
She went back to the us 16 days ago.. oh so long....

friends?
a little tussle there, a little fight there, but most of all i dont even see them anymore... its about time that changes ;-)

Thats it for today, I should get some rest, have some work to do tomorrow...

Keep it up everyone... Take care and I really mean take care!!!