Yeah, its almost been a month and how much life can change in the blink of a moment. So now I got a job, which is better payed then my old one. I have a new gf...some might say again... I know it seems like I have a new one all the time. But its not like that, its not as easy.
Everyone I ve had(only 3) have had a really special meaning to me and have changed my life in one way or another. They are part of me and they will always be, because of them I am the person I am today. They might not know, but I still think of all of them all the time.
Sometimes I wonder, how can someone not, because I m thinkin of so many things that have happend in my life all the time. Bad or good.
The last couple of days, I ve been goin out with a lot of friends and different people, have caught up with a lot of people too. ITs funny to see how many people there are out there that I talk to once in a while, who mean a lot to me, but I still cant manage to stay in contact with and then everytime I catch up with them, I have like a flashback of the good old times and wish they were a bigger part of my life again.

Then there are people I talk to so much, almost every day and then when I dont talk to them, I dont miss it that much. Some of them are really good friends, at least thats what I think sometimes and then in the end I think there is only one really loyal guy out there and I m afraid we movin in different directions, which is really bothering me. What is wrong with me? I ll be there for you bro, anytime.

Comin back to what I did the last couple of days.. one day I figured I ve been spendin all this time with all those people and then again I dont know anyhting about them, so I figured I should ask some deeper questions. What they want to achieve before they die. Where they see themselves in 10 years. The very special moment of their lives. It kind of threw me off, when some of them couldnt answer these questions. Are they seriously not thinkin about stuff like this? About their future, their past, or their most special moments.
Then I also asked them if they regret something they ve done. And that probably stunned me even more. Because most of them didnt regret anything. I felt bad, because I regret so many things I ve done in the past and I just wish I could change it and then I cant.

...to be continued...